7

"Julia, did you put the leftovers in the fridge?"
"I don't remember."
It's been like this ever since she got hit on the head with that shovel.

6

I named my fish after the guy who killed a president.
But I say the Pledge of Allegiance every day at school
so I figure that's okay anyway.

5

We read by lantern
which cast the room in gloomy green
even though we were only awake
because we were afraid of ghosts.

4

Out of 1.7 million volumes,
we both needed the same book.
Kids,
I met your father
when I stole it from his dorm room.

3

we got eaten by a giant, giant worm
that glowed in the dark.

2

Mother said she wished
that nine months before I was born
she had gone bowling, instead.

1

sure I love you,
cross my heart
and hope you die.